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6 Responses to “Tom Richards Wins”

  1. Richards:”THE CIRCUS IS LEAVING BUT THE SHOW MUST GO ON! I’M BACK”

    Saying “Our suburbs need a mayor too”, Tom Richards announced he’s back in the campaign, and ready to accept victory, although he personally still plans to vote for Lovely Ann Warren. He stated: “I am also urging all those people who were over for dinner every night last week to accept my clear endorsement of myself, by which I mean to support Ms. Warren. Although I’ve still never met any of them, all those same diligent people are busy running my campaign. Like the voters, they deserve a clearer answer than the one I gave them recently in that smoky backroom when I asked them all to keep my support and their names secret.”

    Richards also clarified why he waited until the eve of the election to get back in the race. “Look, some of the mudslingers are claiming that starting a campaign effort only after voter registration has ended is somehow a bit sleazy. But I want to people to understand that I only came to this decision this morning. I was in my office looking out the window, listening to Bob Lonsberry and watching the circus as it left town. I knew I just couldn’t let them go. I felt ‘The Show Must Still Go On!”

    When confronted with his statement a week earlier:” I’m for Lovely. I’m done”, the mayor explained by recounting a episode from the old TV series Star Trek. “Last night, I was watching the show where the Captain solves everything with a paradox by stating ‘Listen closely:I AM LYING!’. When the robots blew up, I knew the time for campaign doublespeak was over.”

    Asked to comment on the odd choice of using the radio show of his most active conservative supporter and former critic for this announcement, Richards showed his peacemaker side:”I know Bob is most famous north of the Inner Loop for insulting a former mayor and noted scholar as an “Orangutan”, but this is meant to serve as another clear signal that I seek to end the divisive nature of local politics as usual. Bob also will be the chair of my new neighborhood business initiative, where we will consolidate the existing four quadrant centers into just one on the grounds of the new CityGate Parking Project. My vision of the neighborhood is that we are really just one happy family anyway. If others don’t agree; well they will now be so far away from services that we won’t hear them anymore. Maybe they’ll remember this during my next primary.”

    Richards also revealed that a priority of his new term will be to annex the Monroe County Town of Sweden. “Those people include some of this campaign’s strongest grassroots supporters. I want the real people of Rochester to know that I’ve heard their voice.”

  2. LIVE BLOGGING FROM THE ROLLING RICHARDS ROADSHOW:

    6:30PM RICHARDS TELLS CAMPAIGN:” I’m also Endorsing Maggie for Mayor of Rochester.”

    Mayor Tom Richards countered the recent endorsement of Lovely Ann Warren by County Manager Maggie Brooks by announcing his own third endorsement in three days for the office of Mayor:Maggie Brooks Herself. Richards was asked why he is endorsing someone who is not on the ballot, but he could only blurt out:”I Support Maggie, I’m Done” before Campaign Spokesman Bob Lonsberry ushered him from the room.

    6:45PM BULLETIN: RICHARDS ENDORSEMENT OF OTHERS FOR MAYOR CONTINUE:JOHNSON,NOJAY,TRUMP ADDED. In a one sentence interview with 13WHAM, Tom Richards stated:”I’m also Supporting Bill Johnson, Bill Nojay and The Donald, I am Done”

    7:00PM Anonymous Richards Source:”He also wanted to endorse every past Mayor of Rochester, but we can’t dig most of those guys up.”

    7:15PM Anonymous Richards Source:”You can’t follow the money because all our ads were donated”

    7:30 PM RICHARDS ON GROWING ENDORSEMENT QUAGMIRE “SOME ENDORSEMENTS ARE MORE EQUAL THAN OTHERS”

    7:45PM Richards:”Any more endorsements must wait until Wednesday”

  3. Hilarious. Who is this?!

  4. November 4th, 2013 9:00 PM: LONSBERRY DEMANDS ROCHESTER ANNEX HENRIETTA JUST FOR ELECTION DAY.

    In a breaking story, Richards Campaign Manager Bob Lonsberry is demanding the Mayor to immediately annex the Town of Henrietta just for Election Day. Lonsberry claims that polling shows a close election but also many concerned voters are legally unable to make their voice heard. “We’ll give it back on Wednesday” claimed another anonymous campaign spokesman who also admitted that Richards remains undecided on the strategy. When asked what would happen if Richards refuses to invoke his mayoral powers at the 11th hour, the spokesman continued: “Tom is a true leader. Eventually he’ll do what we tell him. “

    Lonsberry added that he was considering another option and, as a precaution, he had already asked the elders of the seven Rochester area counties to convene a special midnight session, “They stand united ready to annex Rochester in the name of the voter if necessary. Democracy must be served! Regardless how we do it, Tom will come around” More later…

  5. Jim Mayer says:

    Well, I’m going to vote for Lovely Warren. I really like Tom Richards and voted for him in the primary. If he was actively running a campaign I’d vote for him again. He’s not campainging, though, and and despite all the press fluster his statements seemed pretty clear to me. He wanted to be mayor, he lost the primary, he’s done, and he’d like to be there for his grandkids and his family. I respect him too much not to honor those wishes.

    Of the two remaining candidates, I prefer Lovely Warren. She seems pragmatic and I agree with her about the terrible costs of concentrated poverty in the city. My concern with her candidacy is that I can’t quite tell how much of a shift in policy she wants to make. I don’t think that the the city has either the leverage or the money to tackle concentrated poverty head on. I wish I was more certain, but I think that Lovely Warren is smart and pragmatic enough to continue the progress that the city has been making in recent years.

    The best the city can do is to build on the strengths it has, take advantage of the demographic trends that are making cities more attractive places to live, and push to get people living in the center city. More people leads to more retail, more retail leads to more jobs and more money staying in the city. More money means more jobs, people, and small businesses. It’s a virtuous circle, and it starts with making the city a place where people with money want to live. Of course, the mobility that enables people with money to move to the city also makes it easy for them to leave. No administration can afford to forget that.

  6. FINAL WRAP: RICHARDS DECLARES VICTORY AS A CAMPAIGN STAFF HE NEVER MET DISBANDS.

    Shortly before midnight, Rochester Mayor Tom Richards announced victory after a campaign lasting for less than two weeks, one that has proved unusual in its broad bipartisan appeal. It was the end of a long day for Richards that included a last ditch bipartisan, seven county fundraising tour. Richards made his final speech of the election season while standing in the parking lot of his campaign headquarters in Wayne County.

    Richard stated:” We set out 10 days ago to bring this entire region together and we did exactly that. Our message was well received throughout the seven counties of Rochester. In places like Canandaigua, Hilton and Shortsville, voters were so enthused that they were turned away from the polls after being told that I was not on their ballot. I want to thank all my staffers for their hard work. Although I’ve still never met any of these people, they know that they, as well as Lovely, have my support. But it is now time to say, I’ll see you at the Casino. And I believe now, I can finally state that I am done. ”

    Richard’s campaign helpers immediately began disbanding after the statement. Staffer Idoen Tnotem was hired as a spokesman for several Monroe County Attorneys involved with LDC Skimming Project. Another staffer, I .M. Notte Runin, is leaving Rochester to join the secret gubernatorial campaign of Donald Trump. And popular campaigner Eyeyam Dun is reportedly now negotiating with the new “Lampooner Party “for its 2017 Endorsement.

    Finally former Campaign Leader Lonsberry, who arrived at Strong Hospital earlier in the day with a severe allergic Reaction because of “Making Nice with a Rochester Mayor”, was moved to recovery in anticipation of his release Wednesday. Lonsberry is already receiving therapy and is slowly working his way back to health. Radio Station WHAM released its plans for supporting Lonsberry’s aftercare and will allow him to eventually denounce all candidates in the 2013 election as “Losers’ and “The Damned”.

    In a related story, several nearby Wayne County Business Owners who had cancelled their leases and began packing with the news of Richard’s victory suddenly discovered that they did not, in fact, live in the City of Rochester. A spokesman reported that the group is considering legal action against Lonsberry to recover relevant expenses


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